All these years I thought I had my act together as a mom. After all, my kids appear to be clean (so what’s a little ear wax?), nourished (ketchup is a vegetable, right?), educated (thank goodness for spell check), and appropriately dressed (except for my son’s plaid boxers hanging out of his baggy jeans.)

At age 15 (Jack) and 11 (Sari), neither one has yet to flunk a class, swallow bubblegum, beat up anybody, get a tattoo (at least not that I know of), or been arrested for ding dong ditching in the neighborhood.

Somehow I’ve managed to pull this off while I cook, clean (my husband Scott does the toilets), carpool, and get them to every sporting event, activity, and haircut appointment while in my spare time I try to sneak in a movie with my spouse and keep my career alive as a professional freelance writer. Add to my parenting portfolio—I clean their retainers weekly with Efferdent; I collect glue sticks, eraser tips, and sharpies in every color for last-minute school projects; I make banana bread from scratch; I recycle; I’ve been a room mom for the past 20 years.

Lately, however, I feel like I did when I was in first grade at Weber Elementary School and was one of the last kids to be picked for Red Rover in gym class. Never mind the fact that I created a parenting humor column called “Mishegas of Motherhood” (www.mishegasofmotherhood.com), and one of my stories appeared as a webisode in the online sitcom series “In The Motherhood,” starring Leah Remini. And never mind that the largest Jewish women’s volunteer organization Hadassah booked me as their guest speaker at an upcoming dinner banquet on June 5 at Hilton St. Louis Frontenac.

Where I fall short is keeping up with the tech savvy mommybloggers. When it comes to blogging, I don’t know the difference between a podcast and a peapod. Continue reading →